Snippet Sunday – Hard-Boiled/Noir WIP -November 22, 2015

Snippet Sunday is a Facebook group for writers I’ve been privileged enough to have been accepted into.

From the group guidelines; “Welcome to Snippet Sunday, where writers come together to share a few sentences of their current project–whether it’s a recently released novel, a WIP (work in progress), or an older manuscript that’s being revived. Intended to hook readers, gather feedback and build an author’s fan base, Snippet Sunday is the FB group that does all three.”

This week’s snippet comes from a scene a little further on in the story. Jake decides to go into the lion’s den, so to speak. He takes a trip out to Jed’s place to poke around and see what he can stir up. He stirs up more than he can handle…

I vaulted off the porch at a dead run. The sound of my own ragged breathing almost drowned out the racket Jed’s pals made as they stomped and kicked their way through the debris field on their way out of the house.
The bright sunlight had me blinking hard as I staggered across the front yard, dodging farm equipment and disassembled auto carcasses.
Jed’s two friends emerged from the house, hollering and swearing.
I picked the clearest path across the wide lawn and headed straight for the driveway.
The shouts of my pursuers sounded louder and closer as I skidded onto the gravel at the end of the drive. I risked a look back and saw one of the two men take off toward the back of the house. The other stayed on me.
I pulled the Browning from where it sat nestled by my tailbone and ran harder.
My Oldsmobile shone like a metallic mint green beacon of safety in the afternoon sun near the end of the long driveway.

Thanks for stopping by to read my stuff and thanks for any feedback you feel inclined to leave.

Please take the time to visit other Snippet Sunday writers– especially if you’re a Snippet Sunday writer yourself.

Here’s a link to the Facebook page; https://www.facebook.com/groups/SnippetSunday/

 

 

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Posted on November 22, 2015, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. 8 Comments.

  1. Eep! Run, Jake!! Great snippet, Jeff. 🙂

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  2. That’s a cool last line.

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  3. I agree, that “metallic mint green beacon of safety” is a GREAT line. Loved the whole scene, very action-packed.

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  4. I really wonder what makes him run away so fast. It must be terrible, he doesn’t seem like someone who would quit so easily.

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  5. Run! Very exciting snippet. 🙂

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  6. Great snippet, Jeff.

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  7. Always intense and descriptive. Great scene. 🙂

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  8. So much intensity! And the description of the place is so clear. (I love “disassembled auto carcasses.”)

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