#SnippetSunday – Hard-Boiled/Noir WIP – May 31, 2015

Snippet Sunday is a Facebook group for writers I’ve been privileged enough to have been accepted into.

From the group guidelines; “Welcome to Snippet Sunday, where writers come together to share a few sentences of their current project–whether it’s a recently released novel, a WIP (work in progress), or an older manuscript that’s being revived. Intended to hook readers, gather feedback and build an author’s fan base, Snippet Sunday is the FB group that does all three.”

I’m moving a bit ahead in the story, but not far.

It’s the evening of the day of the big fight in town. Jake is having dinner at Beau’s. Jed comes to see him there. They talk. We pick things up in the midst of a conversation about Marisa’s and Jed’s relationship.

“We met on the boardwalk over in Ocean City,” he said. “She dropped a silver ring through the planks. I went under and got it back for her.”

“Big Jed to the rescue.” I polished off my beer. “Classic.”

“It was good enough for her, bud,” he growled. “We had some fun after that. Three days later we were flying to Vegas to get hitched.”

“The whole, ‘go to Vegas, get married by Elvis’, thing.”

“Wayne Newton.”

I looked up from the remnants of my dinner.


“It was a Wayne Newton guy,” he said, shrugging. “Must’ve been Elvis’ night off.”

“Fair enough. Wayne Newton it is.” I signalled Beau for another beer. “How long ago was this?”

“Two years.” He grimaced and curled his fattened upper lip like he smelled something bad. “Longest two years of my life.”

Thanks for dropping by and, as always, thanks for any feedback you feel inclined to leave. If you’re a fellow Snippet Sunday author, please don’t forget to visit your peers’ blogs to check out their work too. This onyl works if we all support each other.


Posted on May 31, 2015, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. 11 Comments.

  1. will be interesting to find out more or why. great snippet.


  2. chellecordero

    I’m enjoying this easy give & take conversation between your characters… longest two years, that a very telling line. Will be tuning in for more.


  3. “Must’ve been Elvis’ night off.” I love it! Great snippet — I love the easy conversation between the two of them.


  4. Just divorce her. lol, this was hilarious. I wonder what he wants with her, and getting married after two days, haha, this all story is madness!


  5. You’ve done an excellent job of writing great friendship chemistry between the characters. And I agree with Linda. This is funny (and good) stuff!


  6. Good conversation with great one-liners as always. When I was much younger I loved Chandler. This sort of conversations kinda remind me of the style.


  7. Marissa is edging closer to the “poisonous” end of the Trouble scale . . . After the last few Sundays, I figured Jake and Jed would end up commiserating, and this is excellent!

    I only hope Jake isn’t completely hooked, yet.

    I am, though. 😀


  8. Karen Michelle Nutt

    Love the banter between the two. Love that ‘Elvis’ had the night off when they got hitched in Vegas. Too funny.


  9. Such a nice flow to the dialog, really feels like I’m eavesdropping on a conversation. Great snippet!


  10. Great dalogue–loved the Wayne Newton line!


  11. A very relaxed piece here, Jeff. You gave us a lot of character development and backstory without making it feel like an infodump. Awesome.


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