#SnippetSunday – As Yet Unnamed WIP (Vigliante/Noir) – September 21, 2014

Snippet Sunday is a Facebook group for writers I’ve been privileged enough to have been accepted into.

From the group guidelines;

“Welcome to Snippet Sunday, where writers come together to share a few sentences of their current project–whether it’s a recently released novel, a WIP (work in progress), or an older manuscript that’s being revived. Intended to hook readers, gather feedback and build an author’s fan base, Snippet Sunday is the FB group that does all three.”

This week’s snippet picks up right where last week’s left off. Danny’s poor impluse control is about to set things in motion for Meyer…

I had to wait for a cab and a rental truck to pass before I followed him across the street.
I looked past him as I walked, noting the Phone Booth’s top-heavy gait and the way he hesitated for a fraction of a second each time he pushed off with his right foot.
His face lit up when he spotted Danny headed his way.
“There he is,” he bellowed, pointing with his right hand, “the man of the hour!”
Right-handed, then. And over-confident.
Danny kept moving, heading for the steps.
The Phone Booth stopped pacing and threw an arm out– the right again– to stop him.
“Hey! I’m talkin’ to you.”
I eyeballed the street, peering into the gaps and shadows as best I could.
An old black man, known for spending his evenings smoking clove cigarettes by the fire hyrdrant halfway down the block, was the only other person in sight.
I took a wide arc approach toward Danny and his new pal, making good use of those gaps and shadows close by the buildings.
Danny looked down at the tree-limb-like arm barring his way.
“Take your hands off me,” he growled.

Thanks for reading!

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Posted on September 21, 2014, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. 10 Comments.

  1. great way to up the tension… eager to know what happens next !

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  2. Enjoyed the tension-filled snippet! Great descriptions to emphasize the man’s size and strength. I like how the character took in everything around him as he sized up the big guy, his moves and all.

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  3. No doubt the fact that he’s right handed will come into play later?
    Nice snippet.

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  4. Well planned and executed. I was with the character step-by-step as he followed The Phone Booth.

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  5. Great visuals and details.

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  6. The man’s huge. I could see the scene playing out. Being right handed must be important to the outcome.

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  7. Loved the build of tension in this seen. Great snippet.

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  8. Immovable object, irresistible force . . . and Danny embodies both, but in a more breakable version.

    Hope Meyer can keep that from happening! 🙂

    Awesome as always, Jeff!

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  9. Well done! Can’t wait to see what’s next!

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  10. I would say take the hand of him and run. But I want Danny to kick his ass. Nice snippet!

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